One of those very uncommon nights, I managed to watch television. And as autumn started bringing cold winds, my son felt the need to cuddle up to me with his blanket and pillow. As we relaxed, we were flicking through the television channels and happened to watch a documentary about abortion with a person showing the audience a bottle of what seemed to be remnants of several foetuses.
As my son knows that he is adopted (as per Australian government’s requirement), he consciously knows that he was born while both of his biological parents had their own families. So, during those days when he becomes this emotional ten-year old child (who thinks he is already an adult), he sometimes gets overwhelmed by a strong feeling of being a mistake and being a rejected child. As we understand that this is a natural emotional response as a consequence of his life situation, we are always there to support him, hug him, explain things to him and even feel the pain with him.
But that night, when he saw the contents of that bottle, he blurted out: “Mum, I’m lucky to be alive!” I’m happy my biological mother did not abort me!” To which I immediately replied: “Yes, your mother was a very courageous woman! She made sure that you had a chance to experience and enjoy this world!”
And yes, she could have easily aborted this baby because she knew this would cause her to lose her husband and children, and lose face among her circle of relatives, friends and church community. In addition, as she was overseas during her pregnancy, she knew there would have been several occasions that people would have recognised her being pregnant. She could have simply given up and terminated it. However, she was smart enough to seek ways and means to bring her baby to life.
I really hope that the TV show we watched would have a strong impact on my son’s view of the world. I trust that he will appreciate more his biological mother for being courageous and resourceful in bringing him to life amidst all the risks and reasons for doing otherwise.
As his adoptive parent, I feel blessed that our son is part of our family. And this blessing is due to the strength and foresight of his biological mother. He is a talented, generous and compassionate young man. He may have used the word “lucky” as an expression but I believe he knows that he is truly blessed to have been given life through someone’s brave and generous decision.